New Music Showcase: "Onyx" by Jackie Extreme
(The poll is closed, and Onyx by Jackie Extreme has officially been inducted into the TRAPPO Essentials Can(n)on. Hooray. -D)
Hello, dear listener. Funny running into you here, on the official TRAPPO blog. It's that time again, dear listener. Time for a brand-new installment of the show you all know and love, TRAPPO's New Music Showcase! Can you believe it? We're back again! How many of these have we done now? Twenty? Thirty? Oh, this is just the fourth? Huh. So it only feels like thirty. Are you enjoying these New Music Showcase things, friends? Based on our statistics and overall lack of feedback, you're really not. So why do we keep making them? Because we're stupid, apparently. Who could predict that something so simple and innocent as attempting to share interesting new music here on TRAPPO with people would backfire so spectacularly? Not us. But I guess we're just gonna keep pushing forward with these New Music Showcases regardless. We don't learn from our own mistakes very well. After all, we've been making podcasts in one form or another for over ten years and our audience has actually contracted considerably from where we began, so that's just damning evidence.
Have you ever heard of Jackie Extreme? Probably not. Who is Jackie Extreme? What is Jackie Extreme? It's a big mystery, folks. Pop music for the upcoming machine apocalypse! On this exciting edition of TRAPPO's New Music Showcase, we're investigating the Jackie Extreme mystery as we showcase Onyx, their latest release, because nobody demanded it. It's just natural curiosity. What does it all mean? Let's find out! You can listen below, or find TRAPPO on Apple, Google, Pocket Casts, RadioPublic, Spotify, Spunkify for Muttcasters and Amazon, so choose your own adventure and ignore our latest episode at your leisure!
There's a conversation going on right now, dear listener. I don't know where it is, exactly, since it doesn't appear to be happening here anymore, but we'd still enjoy your feedback if you're willing to share it. Just type a comment below. Tell us what's on your mind. Tell us what you think of Jackie Extreme's Onyx. Tell us why you decided to stop commenting on our blog with a comment on our blog. We used to have a fair amount of regulars, but they've all made friends with each other and decided we don't matter anymore. That's a real blow to the old ego, right there. But I guess at least TRAPPO has been good for something, so that's cool. If you're still reading, I sincerely apologize. There's no reason for this sad sack garbage. Just leave a comment below if you have a soul. We're so lonely here, and we need your comments to survive. We might actually be dying of loneliness, like that fuzzy emo prick from Beauty And The Beast. And unlike that asshole, who could only offer Stockholm Syndrome, we actually provide theoretical entertainment! And it's free! So leave us a comment. Tell us things. You can also send us an email, but you never do. The address is trapposhow@gmail.com, if you're interested, which you're not. But we remain pathetically optimistic.
That's it. Listen. Vote. Comment. Tell your friends. Goodbye for now.
Is this music made by AI? Have we reached that point yet?
ReplyDeleteI think this is pretty neat. Never heard of Jackie Extreme before, but maybe now I’m a fan. Who knows? I’ve also never heard of a “vocaloid” before, so that’s a whole thing, but I don’t think Jackie is one of those. I feel like this is a lady pretending to be a robot, but of course I could be wrong. Either way, taste the pound cake!
ReplyDeleteThis ish is horny and I dig it
ReplyDeleteMaybe I don’t understand music anymore. This is the kind of stuff new artists are doing, and it’s confusing as hell. Too much time online, and you start to feel like maybe you’re not really real. I genuinely wonder what the world’s going to look like in another few decades. This mad evolution of pop culture into something amorphous and alien that is simultaneously fascinating and repulsive.
ReplyDeleteI don’t understand the appeal of this music. I also don’t understand the appeal of this show. I also don’t understand the appeal of an apple.
ReplyDeleteI genuinely still do not get this vocaloid stuff. It’s popular? I’ve sampled some Hatsune Miku tracks, and the voice doesn’t sound remotely convincing. People like to push the envelope and try new things, but sometimes I’m just baffled. But I like pagan neo-folk, so maybe I shouldn’t be taking out of turn. I’m pretty sure Jackie Extreme isn’t some kind of new vocaloid, though. The music is creative and catchy, and I like it. And maybe some of the other old regulars have fled for greener pastures, but you’ve still got me! And Bimmy, I guess. So maybe talk about some Beck? Eh? He’s “where it’s at”!
ReplyDeleteMaybe instead of complaining that your old listeners left, you should try to attract new listeners. Crazy idea, I know. But maybe you dummy’s should try that out. Also try making a good podcast. People might actually listen to something that doesn’t suck. Just think about that for a few seconds.
ReplyDeleteTRAPPO TOILETS FLUSH THE WORLD
ReplyDelete